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GrandmaDon't ask Grandma silly questions
Lawyers should never ask grandma a question if they
aren't prepared for the answer.
In a trial , a small-town prosecuting attorney called
his first witness , an elderly grandmother to the stand. He approached
her and asked; "Mrs. Jones , do you know me?"
She responded 'Why , yes , I do know you , Mr.
Williams. I've known you since you were a young boy , and frankly ,
you're a big disappointment to me. You lie , cheat on your wife ,
manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think
you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you never will
amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you.'
The lawyer was stunned! Not knowing what else to do , he
pointed across the room and asked, "'Mrs.. Jones , do you know the
defense attorney?"
She again replied , "Why , yes , I do. I've known Mr.
Bradley since he was a youngster. He's lazy , bigoted , and has a
drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone and
his law practice is one of the worst in the state. Not to mention he
cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your
wife. Yes I know him."
The defense attorney almost died.
The judge asked both lawyers to approach the bench and
in a quiet voice said: "'If either of you asks her if she knows me, I'll
send you to the electric chair.'" 
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